Friday, October 14, 2011

April 20, 1932

Dearest Kat -

Guess you're saying - damn a woman like Lucile Nowlin anyway - has she got writers cramp. I answer no. I merely have spring fever plus complications like, blueness, disappointment and discouragement. And this last two weeks have been test weeks - and your letter was missent. The mail service to this town is zero minus.

Thanks for the poem - that was the one I wanted. As for the answer to the question - I know darned well I have to face life without him. I've known all along I couldn't ever have him - ever since I started going with him. But I'll have to break down and admit I could face the next forty or fifty years of my life with a great deal more joy and equanimity if I thought all the things I dream of could be true. But I have no allusions about that. And could I just enjoy being around him? I think so. Katherine, I'm honestly learning things about being in love. I know I've never even remotely been in love before. Ain't this a helluva note. I don't know how I'll survive this summer. He said once he wasn't going to write. (I'll change his mind.) But three days is as long as I can stand even when I see him downtown or when he comes for Donald & Doris at school, so what will I do for 2 months. He'll come to Mobile to see me before I leave. He'd better. I got the cutest picture Monday. I think it was one made for the annual last year. Anyways, it's plumb good. I just loves it.

Weep, Weep. the orchestra is playing "Auf Weidersen." I really like that piece.
We're going on a fish fry tomorrow night. I'm really glad its turned warm. Moonlight. The man I love, a campfire. Oh la la. They put it off twice last week for Beverly and me. I had to go to P.T.A. Thurs and Wed. he had to keep the kids.

There's no news. I'm afraid I'd get morbid if I wrote the things I've been thinking since last Friday. I'm really discouraged and tired. Wish the next six weeks would pass while I slept some night. We were supposed to get out May 27 but got 2 wks Xmas so we don't get out until June 3. Then I don't know how I'm going to N.Y. Mary Jane is going so I don't know where I'll meet her, Nash. or Memphis or Atlanta. We'll leave about June 15 or 20. I dread thoughts of school, but it's perferable to teaching. 'Less "somepin" happens I won't be alive to go anywhere. Gotta stop & go mail this.

Love, Cile.

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